The Adventures of
Sport:
The Spirit of the Season
By
Note:
The Sport here is the original one, the one with attitude,
who appeared in the credits and was present on the series until the
end of Season Three.
Christmas,
Sport decided, was one of the more exasperating human puzzles. Not a conundrum,
not anything fancy like that, where your pursuit of an answer only resulted in
meeting yourself coming and going. It was just a question mark. What all this
fuss at the end of the year meant to the two-legged race was plain old
confusing.
Trying
to figure it out was probably a waste of his time, but he wasn’t one to settle
for ignorance. And, on Christmas Eve, there were plenty of hours to ponder it
because nothing else was going on; it was silent in the barn, the lone
disturbance the sound of the wind whistling in the cold night outside.
He
put his mind to work. The only thing Christmas meant for horses was an extra
day’s rest and a ration of hot mash—certainly nothing earth-shaking. Oh,
yeah, and lumps of sugar; Chubb’d think he was crazy if he forgot the sugar.
He preferred carrots himself, but they weren’t an option in December.
Somehow
his thought must have strayed into the next stall, because Chubb roused out of a
doze and muttered, “Wonder when they’re gonna bring tha mash?”
Across
the aisle, Cochise nibbled at a flake of hay. “Prob’ly not till tomorrow
morning. Don’t you figure they’re all in there entertainin’ the kid?”
That
was likely, Sport agreed mentally. Hop Sing’s nephew had come out to help his
uncle prepare Christmas dinner, but an unexpected snow had precluded his
father’s coming to fetch him. It was the six-year-old’s first night away
from home, and they all figured he was probably growing more nervous by the
moment. Hoss and Joe for sure—and likely Mr. Cartwright and Adam too—would
be turning themselves inside out to make sure young Hop Lee got a taste of
candlelit trees and presents and singing and so on.
Which
brought him back to the question of what it was all about. Hop Lee represented
another aspect of the problem; humans didn’t all look at the season the same
way. The Chinese didn’t celebrate Christmas, and come to think of it, Sport
was pretty sure the Paiutes didn’t either. He’d never seen too many of the
people who came in various shades of chocolate, but now he wondered how they
felt about December twenty-fifth.
On
the whole, he couldn’t help wondering what Adam thought of it all. The Boss
had fun like everyone else, and he really got into the singing, but certainly he
didn’t swallow the whole mismatched bunch of ideas without a question or two
…
“Prob’ly
even found a stockin’ for ’im,” Chubb was speculating. Because Buck’s
eyes were closed, he kept his voice down, but a sweet pleasure hummed in his
words. “Filled it with nuts ’n’ stuff, maybe even that lil’ penknife
Hoss bought th’ other day an’ then reckoned was too pretty ta use.”
Sport
fought a grin. If Chubb had been a human, he’d have been St. Nicholas.
“’Twas
the night before Christmas,” his friend couldn’t resist reciting, forgetting
to whisper.
Cochise
winked, glanced furtively at the buckskin in the next stall, and continued,
“And all through the house …”
“It
is late, young man!” Buck’s deep bass resonated with displeasure.
“I’m trying to sleep, and it would be a good idea if you did too.”
They
all rolled their eyes, but Sport did his part and contributed, “Not a creature
was stirring, not even a mouse.”
“What
else is new?” growled the big calico cat curled up on Buck’s rump. He was
about as sociable as his host. “Not a rodent alive in that house. I made sure
o’ that. Now shut up.”
“Yeah,
Mouser, we all know y’er good at yer job,” Chubb placated him hastily.
“Where’d them words come from, Sport? I cain’t remember when we didn’
all know ’em. Was it somethin’ Adam wrote?”
“Huh-uh.
Someone named Clement Clark Moore. No doubt inspired by the Great Equine In The
Sky, as it has a certain amount of panache.”
“Yeah,
well, it’s a lot better’n that story with the ghosts.”
“A
Christmas Carol,” Sport nodded. “Dickens. Depressing, if you ask me.”
Cochise
snickered. “It’s a sure bet Adam didn’t write that one. It’s the one
with the kid who can’t do anything wrong.”
Buck
abandoned the notion of sleep and cleared his throat. “Are you implying that
Dickens patterned Tiny Tim on Little Joe?”
“Well,
you know … Tiny Tim … Little Joe. … You gotta admit—”
Sport
snorted. “If Charles Dickens said ‘poor Tiny Tim’ once in that yarn, he
said it a dozen times. Joe Cartwright’s never been poor in his life—well,
except for maybe on Saturday nights after a bad run of luck, but I don’t think
that’s what Dickens had in mind.”
“Dickens
meant sickly and likely to die soon,” Buck informed him.
“Well,
that either. Joe’ll still be shot from a gun long after we’re through the
rainbow.”
“Or
wherever the Great Equine sends you.”
Sport
chose to hear only the wry amusement in Buck’s voice.
Just
then the big plank door of the barn wavered open, propelled solely by a small
Chinese boy in an overcoat. Allowing the child to do his part, Hoss followed
behind, a bucket in each hand. The smell of warm mash floated on the air as he
stopped to light a kerosene lantern.
“Bet
you fellers thought we’d fergot about ya,” he said jovially. “Hop Lee, you
go op’n the door on that buckskin-there’s stall.”
No
one thought it strange that Buck should be served first. Only Hop Lee looked
unsure, as he stopped short and gazed up into the big gelding’s face. Buck’s
no pony, Sport thought sympathetically. Probably
looks like a Trojan statue to that little kid. First all this Christmas
folderol, and now a horse the size of Texas. But you could count on Buck; he
lowered his head, radiating good humor, and the boy seemed to relax.
“Just
give ’im a nice rub on the face,” Hoss directed, “’n’ Mouser, you
behave yerself. This lil’ shaver’s our guest fer tonight.” He wedged past
the boy to scoop steaming mash into the buckskin’s feed tub and then reached
over the partition to do the same for the pinto.
“You
guys be friendly ta Hop Lee here,” he continued conversationally. “He
ain’t had much experience with critters like you, so ya don’ wanta go an’
scare ’im none. … He’s stuck out here, cain’t go home ta his ma an’ pa
till tomorrah, an’ he don’t know nothin’ ’bout Christmas. I told ’im
it’s tha nicest night o’ the year, but it’s up ta us ta show ’im how it
is.”
Show me while you’re at it, Sport
thought. He liked to make more progress with his puzzles.
“We
done had a nice big dinner, and we sang some Christmas carols—” The sound of
a child’s infectious giggle broke off Hoss’ comment, and the big man
chuckled. “Okay, maybe I don’t sing so good—”
“You
sing loud,” Hop Lee offered.
“Well,
somebody’s got to, ya know? Some folks like you don’t hardly squeak out a
note.”
The
boy grinned and went back to patting Buck’s face.
“But
ya like these horses, don’t ya?”
“Yes,
Mis-tah Hoss.”
“An’
they like you too, Hop Lee. Ya gotta remember you got all kinds o’ friends out
here.”
At
that moment, amazingly, Mouser dropped from Buck’s back and strolled over to
Hop Lee, closing his eyes to thrust his head against the boy’s legs. Sport
caught Chubb’s gaze in surprise; Mouser approached almost no one, but tonight
you could hear his loud purr.
Hoss
noticed too. “Hey, Hop Lee, looks like ya found yerself another friend—an’
that one’s mighty partic’lar.”
The
boy dropped to Mouser’s level and stroked the cat’s head. “Like my dog.”
Sport
choked painfully and coughed to clear his breathing. Mouser could turn deadly at
the thought of being compared to a dog, but the cat must have understood the
child’s intentions, because no mayhem resulted.
“Okay,
lil’ buddy, looks like we’re finished here—and somethin’ tells me
there’s a present under the tree fer ya, so we’d better get on back. Anybody
tell ya we got a Ponderosa tradition? Always open one present on Christmas
Eve.”
“I
don’ undehstan’, Mis-tah Hoss, but what you tell me to do, I do.”
“Well,
now, Hop Lee, there ain’t nothin’ hard ta understand about presents.” Hoss
blew out the lantern. A moment later, the barn door closed behind them.
“Presents
…” Cochise mumbled, his mouth full of mash. “They make me tired. If it
hadn’t been for the snow, Joe’d have been all over the countryside,
delivering presents. I hate to even think about when the roads clear.”
Everyone
had a good laugh at that, even if they didn’t envy the extra miles Cochise
would be putting in. Apparently Joe Cartwright’s list of lady friends hadn’t
gotten any shorter this year.
“I
cain’t figure what I’d even want if I wuz a human,” Chubb reflected.
“Sugar, I reckon, an’ I got that.”
“Horses
don’t need gifts,” Buck said.
“Just
clutter,” Sport agreed. “Who wants it?”
“Aw,
now, Sport, y’er jus’ bein’ silly,” Chubb snickered. “You know fer
sure you’d be happy as a pig in—well, you know—if Adam’d give ya a
bottle o’ that champagne ya like.”
Sport
grunted. In fact, he’d mentioned that to the Boss a few times, and he didn’t
like admitting that smart as Adam was, he wasn’t any better at understanding
the equine language than any other human. “I’m not gonna hold my breath,”
he replied. “Still don’t know why this time of the year should be any
different from any other.”
Buck
finally raised his head from his feed tub. “Strictly speaking, it isn’t
about the presents and the food,” he said. “The actual celebration is of the
birth of the human god Jesus, the one who came to earth in a stable.”
“That
showed good taste,” Sport wisecracked. In present company, he didn’t need to
add that being born in a barn wasn’t any great achievement.
Cochise
glanced up with interest. “A stable, huh? The Great Equine must have been
involved.”
“Quite
possibly,” the buckskin assented.
“How
come folks don’ have enuff sense to know ’bout the Great Equine?” Chubb
inquired. “Sure would make things easier.”
No
one could answer that, but Sport figured it was worth advancing an opinion.
“Maybe they do, in their own way. Just last Sunday, I heard Adam talking to
the reverend about human gods and the Paiutes and whoever they pray to. Adam
said he thought people probably see their god in whatever form they can
understand. Or admire or something.”
Chubb’s
eyes reflected his concentration. “What’s zat mean?”
“I
think it means he sees the Great Equine with two legs,” Sport replied
judiciously. Which raised an interesting question: If the humans saw the Great
Equine with two legs, was it still the Great Equine? Talk about a conundrum. He
had to find a way to get Adam to consider that one.
Cochise
couldn’t stifle a high-pitched whinny. “Something they can understand and
admire? Then Joe’s god probably has long pretty hair and wears dresses!”
“Boys!” Buck’s
admonition silenced them immediately. “I think the Great Equine would demand
respect for all gods. It’s not the fault of human beings that they don’t
correctly understand the—uh—the organization of the universe.”
“How
come the Great Equine don’t demand no big party fer his
birthday?” Chubb asked.
Buck
raised his head imperially. “I don’t think he needs
a celebration. Jesus probably doesn’t either, but the Great Equine can count
on us to remember his principles. It’s my opinion that humans need reminding
at least once a year of how they’re supposed to live.”
“Okay,
so let’s get this straight,” Sport said. His frustration was building.
“The humans are still trying to figure out how they’re supposed to be, and
for some reason, they think it’ll help if they celebrate the birth of this god
in a stable”—he flung his tail impatiently—“which means they go out and
get strange stuff probably half of ’em don’t want, wrap it all up and hand
it out to each other. And until they pass it around, it lives under a tree
that’s been killed and dragged into the house for nothing more than that.
Furthermore, they light up the tree with candles, which any moron can see is a
fire hazard! They eat a lot, and they sing, and in amongst all this, they
somehow mix up ghosts and sick little boys and heaven knows what else. You might
say the stuff about Comet and Blitzen and Prancer is kind of fun, but I ask
you—have any of you ever seen a reindeer around here, let alone a fat
saint?”
Chubb
eyed him apprehensively. “What’s got inta you, Sport? Y’er turnin’ inta
some kind o’ Scrooge er somethin’.”
“Bah,
humbug!” Cochise sniffed helpfully.
“It’s
just Christmas,” Sport snapped, and then catching the look on Chubb’s face,
he added lamely, “It gets aggravating.”
Cochise
giggled. “This is what comes of too much thinking.”
Sport
sighed; there was a chance Cochise was right. All of the sudden, the mash
didn’t taste as good as it had. “I’m going for a walk.”
He
arched his neck over his stall door, lipped up its rope fastener between his
teeth and tugged skillfully. In a moment, the big gate drifted outward and he
followed it. No one said anything as he pushed open the barn door, strode
through it and closed it behind him.
ii
Outside,
Sport stood still, filling his lungs with the clean, chilly air and trying to
order his thoughts. It was beautiful—dark and silent and majestic in a way
that could happen only in nature. Nothing going on inside the big log house
could compare to this, he reflected, as the tranquility began to edge out his
irritation. The snow was still coming down, landing gently on his chestnut coat
and mostly melting in the heat of his body. It gathered on his mane, though, and
he enjoyed shaking his head, sending it flying around his eyes. He did it again,
wishing his forelock were longer; it was like little butterfly-strokes when it
flicked across his face.
If you’re going to celebrate something,
he thought, celebrate this. Celebrate being alive in the world, strong and healthy,
on a night so pretty that it makes your heart stop.
Across
the yard, he could see the yellow glow of the window over Mr. Cartwright’s
office, and curious about what was going on inside, he moved toward it, keeping
to the shadows along the wing of the house. The snow was powdery and crunched
beneath his feet, but it paid to watch out for icy patches, and he was only as
far as the big pine tree when he realized that he wasn’t alone. Adam stood on
the front porch near the planter, gazing out at the hazy landscape, a cup of
coffee in his hand sending off tendrils of steam.
Perfect, Sport thought.
Maybe the Boss can explain some of
what’s going on here. It was a cinch that Adam would have given some
thought to the meaning of Christmas; Adam thought about the meaning of pretty
much everything, if he had nothing better to do. And even if there were no great
revelations, it would be pleasant to stand around in the night with his human,
just kind of getting along without all the answers.
But
before he could move closer, he heard the front door open and close, and Ben
Cartwright appeared. He too wore a coat and carried a cup of hot liquid—had to
be coffee, Sport figured, but he caught a whiff of brandy too.
“I
thought I’d find you here,” the Boss’ father was saying.
“Thought
I’d let dinner settle; Hop Sing outdid himself,” Adam replied, and chuckled.
“It helps if you go into training for a Ponderosa Christmas.”
Mr.
Cartwright smiled his agreement and stared out into the yard, where the mist of
white had softened the familiar shapes and the dark forest beyond. “It’s not
too bad out tonight—not as cold as you’d expect,” he said, his voice
hushed. “Night like this … makes you think the whole earth’s at rest. You
can almost feel the miracle that began it all.”
“The
whole earth slowing down for a night,” Adam mused. “I’d say that’s
a miracle.”
Ben
looked faintly annoyed for a moment, and then changed to an expression that all
the horses, particularly Sport, knew well: the one which said ‘You’re
marching to that different drummer again, but I’ve learned not to let it
bother me.’
Adam’s
eyes twinkled lazily. “It’s all in the perception of miracles, Pa.”
“You
used to worry the daylights out of me when your brothers were young,” Ben
retorted.
“Because
you were afraid I’d say the wrong thing and ruin Christmas for them?”
“It
was rather obvious that you weren’t very sure about Mary giving birth in a
stable.”
Adam
shrugged. “I’m not against religion. I’ve just never been able to see why
we should get all worked up about where or when a man—or a god—was born. It
doesn’t really make a difference.”
Sport
nodded to himself. As much mortal coming and going as Adam had seen, he’d
probably figured out early on that the special folks were important for more
than just their time on earth. It was understandable that he’d think it was
the same for a god.
Adam
took a sip of his coffee. “But I wouldn’t have spoiled Christmas for Hoss or
Joe. Surely you knew that.”
Ben
nodded and his voice was reflective. “Yes … yes, after a year or two, I
realized that. Marie did too, and we quit worrying. But it was inside you,
son—we knew there were so many questions, and sometimes you just couldn’t
help asking them.”
They
fell silent for a minute, father and son simply taking in the night, and then
Ben set down his cup and said, “One thing you can’t deny about Christmas,
and that’s the look on a child’s face when he sees a Christmas tree or sings
a carol.”
“Like
Hop Lee tonight,” Adam smiled. “He seemed pretty impressed with it all.”
“Not
so much impressed,” Ben objected. “Don’t you think, more—enchanted?
It’s too bad we didn’t know he’d be here. Hoss could have worked up a St.
Nicholas costume—”
“Pa,”
Adam cut in, not without humor, “you’re gonna have a big enough job
explaining all of this to his parents. He’ll be the only boy in Chinatown with
thirty-five candy canes—”
“I
know, I know.” Ben waved a hand. “I’ll speak to Hop Ling. But it really
was just what he needed. Hop Sing took him up to bed a few minutes ago, and you
could tell he was getting a little shaky—lonely, I suppose, understandable the
first time away from home and with no preparation. Anyway, I think we helped.”
“Yeah.”
Adam was thoughtful. Around them, the only sound was the slow rustle of the wind
in the trees. Neither spoke, but Sport had a feeling that neither had forgotten
what had started their discussion.
“It’s
not the actual birth of a man—or a god—that’s important, you know,” Ben
finally said quietly.
“It’s
who he was, what he started,” Adam responded, his voice low, automatic.
“Yeah. And that we live by it.”
Ben
nodded. “M’m-h’m.” A gleam of amusement rose in his eyes. “But
there’s no shame in enjoying a celebration.”
“Thank
God—at least, in this family,” Adam replied dryly.
A
full-blown grin lit Ben’s face, and he clapped his son on the shoulder.
“Don’t stay out too late.” He was halfway across the porch before Adam’s
voice stopped him.
“Pa
… was that my answer or yours?”
“The
part about it being more than just a child in a manger that’s so important?”
Ben gazed at his son for a long moment. “Yours, son. You came to that on your
own. If you don’t remember telling me, it was the year Marie died … on a
night very much like this one.”
Adam
nodded, his eyes returning to the dark yard.
“It
so happens that I agree with you,” Ben continued softly, drawing his son’s
gaze back with his words. “But you know I’ve never felt it was wrong to
believe in more.”
Adam
nodded again.
“I’ve
also never doubted your beliefs, son. Too many times—when we were alone, and
then when Hoss’ mother—your
mother—died, it was your faith that got me through.”
“I
was a kid.”
“And
at the time, you had the simple faith of a child.”
“Boys
grow up.”
“Yes,
little boys do—but I know my son.” Ben breathed in deeply, gathering a great
sigh, but Sport could tell that he wasn’t sad. “Adam, it was the good Lord
who gave you the mind and the spirit that drives you, and as far as I can tell,
you’ve used them to find your own relationship with Him. I don’t argue with
that.” For a moment, his warm gaze spoke even more eloquently. Then he turned
to the door. “Good night, son.”
There
wasn’t going to be a better time, Sport reckoned. Maybe he could get Adam to
discourse a little on what had been said. He hadn’t gotten much beyond the big
pine tree when his human looked up and saw him.
“What’re
you doing out here?” the Boss asked. Sport ambled forward more quickly to save
Adam’s getting off the porch. The snow in the yard was deeper than it looked.
Solving the problems of the world, Boss,
he answered with a little whicker. Trying
to figure out this Christmas stuff. Good to know you have your reservations too.
Adam
ran an affectionate hand over Sport’s face. “Solving the problems of the
world, old man?”
Sport
nearly fell over; never, not once, ever, had the Boss understood him so
perfectly. It had to be a mistake. Either that or Christmas really did sprout
miracles. Yeah, Boss. I’m just curious about all this Christmas stuff. Doesn’t
make sense why anybody would need anything more than what we’ve got right now.
“Pretty
night, isn’t it, fellow?” Adam scratched gently behind Sport’s ears.
“Hard to figure why you need any other reason to celebrate when you can look
around and see a night like this.”
Sport
snuffled to cover his surprise; he and the Boss read each other pretty well for
two beings who had to sense what the other was thinking, but this was different.
This was like holding a real conversation.
Well, I think so too, but I’d still like to know what Tiny Tim has to do with
Jesus. And a few other things too.
Adam
chuckled. “Yeah, I know, but you’re too smart to get all worked up over
Christmas. Just enjoy your warm mash and don’t worry about the rest of it.”
Sport
nudged him hard on the chest.
“Okay,
so it’s tempting to try to figure it out.” Adam started to sip the last of
his coffee, found it cold and tossed it out into the snow. At the same time, his
glance fell upon a wooden box, pushed up against the wall, out of the snowfall.
Sport
looked over curiously, and his heart began to pound; this night was getting more
amazing by the second. Branded into the side of the box were the words LOUIS ROEDERER, REIMS, FRANCE.
Champagne.
“Hop
Sing appears to be chilling the wine for dinner tomorrow,” Adam remarked, and
then a glint of comprehension showed on his face.
Boss, Sport implored
with his eyes. Merry Christmas, Boss.
“Well,”
Adam sighed, a little smile twitching at the corners of his mouth. “If you
insist on discussing philosophy—or, God forbid, religion—I refuse to do it
cold sober.” He lifted the loose panel on top of the box, pulled out one of
the heavy, dark bottles and tore away the coppery-gold foil at its crown.
Before
Sport’s rapt gaze, the fat cork gave way and a little stream of vapor escaped
upward in the frosty air. He nearly swooned—and his knees almost gave way
entirely when he saw Adam swishing snow through both his cup and the one Ben had
left on the table. His human poured two hefty portions of the fizzy liquid and
held one out.
“Merry
Christmas, boy. If I’m not mistaken, this is a favorite of yours.” Adam’s
brows lifted sardonically. “Or at least, it certainly seemed like it back at
Colleen Meriweather’s … and I’m not sure it didn’t have something to do
with that night you dragged me into the pond, but I’m still working on that
one.”
Boss, I underestimated your powers of observation,
Sport thought, and considered asking why, if Adam knew so much, his human had
failed to provide him with the libation earlier. But then again, it wasn’t
smart to look a gift human in the mouth; he should just be glad for special
occasions. Making it a habit could come later. He funneled his tongue and sucked
up a healthy shot of champagne, delighting in the spiky-cold trail it left as it
fled down his throat.
He
snorted again, this time with appreciation, and ran his muzzle gratefully up
Adam’s arm. Christmas was getting better all the time.
“Sport,
look …” Adam’s voice was patient as he refilled Sport’s cup and set it
on the table. “If you’re gonna drink this, you have to have a little
restraint. You don’t just gulp down fine champagne.”
Sport
eyed him. To date, he’d found no fault with his method of inhaling the stuff,
but he was open to suggestions. He sipped a little more carefully. Damn.
The flavor was even more nuanced than it had been before. It was a perfect
example of why he usually listened to the Boss; this way he could get farther on
less, which seemed like a good idea, as it was rare that he ran across unlimited
champagne.
He
was busily licking the last hint of taste from the china cup when he felt
Adam’s attention shift elsewhere. “Good heavens, even a floorshow,” the
Boss murmured, and Sport looked up to follow his gaze.
Across
the clearing, the kitchen door swung open, and an oblong of translucent gold
gleamed against the snow as Hoss Cartwright emerged.
That, in itself, would not have been remarkable, but he crouched over,
stepping daintily as if to avoid the slightest crunch of snow.
They were entranced. The footing was uncertain, Sport recognized, but the
overall impression was that Hoss didn’t want to be seen or heard.
Not easy for a guy his size,
he rumbled softly.
“About
like an elephant at the ballet,” Adam agreed in an undertone, and refilled
Sport’s cup.
Sport
was glad he didn’t have his tongue in the champagne; it would have been a
shame to waste it. Adam’s voice was warm with affection, but he couldn’t
stifle the humor.
“Now,
don’t hold your breath,” the Boss continued languidly, “but our younger
brother will be along any time now.”
Sure
enough, Hoss was no more than a dozen feet from the door when Joe crept out as
well. It was a good thing, Sport reckoned, that the brothers were faced toward
the barn and so intent on whatever they were doing that they didn’t notice any
movement in the darkness on the far side of the porch.
Adam
stepped down into the snow to lean against Sport’s shoulder, settling in
comfortably for the performance.
“Gotta
be ’round here sumwhere, Joe,” Hoss was saying.
Sport
flicked an ear at his human.
“Unless
I miss my guess, they’re looking for Mouser,” the Boss said, barely above a
whisper. “Pa said Hop Lee was a little lonely when he went up to bed.” He
arched an eyebrow at the chestnut gelding. “Do you really think Hoss and Joe
are going to let him lie there like a lost puppy? Or, ah, as the case may be …
a lost kitten?”
Sport
dipped his head to indicate that he understood the situation. But the idea of
Mouser being of any use boggled the mind. Humans could be cockeyed dreamers.
“Sort
of qualifies as a rock and hard place, don’t you think?” Adam went on. “My
brothers versus Mouser?”
The
chestnut gelding essayed a prim sip of champagne and checked to make sure Adam
noticed his manners, but the Boss was still intent on the snow-covered yard.
“Well,
I’ll be …” he breathed.
Sport
strangled a whistle of surprise. Sure enough, there was Mouser, strolling the
top rail of the corral like a trapeze artist on a high wire.
“Two
pounds of carrots all the way from California says Joe and Hoss won’t get
him.”
Sport
shook his head. Two pounds, six pounds; wasn’t any way he was taking that bet.
Hoss
caught Joe’s shoulder. “Joe! Joe, look-a there … over on th’ fence.”
“Ssh! Don’t scare
’im …”
The
whisper carrying across the yard announced Hoss’ incredulity. “Scare Mouser?
What-chu been drinkin’?”
“Nothin’—now
just be quiet and go around that way. I’ll go this way. Whichever way he goes,
one of us’ll have him.”
“You
have to understand,” Adam lectured casually to Sport, “that every great
military commander who’s tried a pincer movement such as my brothers are
attempting—every one from, oh, say, the ancient Greeks to Wellington at
Waterloo—has realized that you have to control where your adversary is going
to go. Correct me if I’m wrong, but it appears to me that Mouser has quite a
few choices here.”
Sport
squinted toward the corral, noting with satisfaction that the snow had
diminished and it was easier to see. The holiday moon cast the rails into high
relief against the white background, and Mouser’s orange and black spots stood
out like a target. Other options? The gelding counted six at least. He mumbled
his agreement to Adam and slurped up a discreet dose of champagne.
“Try
callin’ him,” Joe instructed hoarsely.
“Callin’
’im? Why’d I wanta do that? He’ll jus’ run.”
“Right—and
when he jumps off away from you, I’ll grab him.”
“Oh.
Yeah.” Even across the yard, they could see Hoss’ face screw up. “Here,
Mouser!” he called tentatively in an alarming falsetto. “Kitty, kitty,
kitty!”
Sport
lost his breath and hiccupped a snort that got by only because he drowned out
Adam’s gurgling choke. Fortunately for them both, Hoss and Joe were too
involved in their mission to hear the unusual sounds from the general direction
of the house.
Mouser
viewed Hoss’ approach with disdain, but he didn’t move.
“Joe,
he’s even purrin’. I can hear ’im.”
You’re in trouble,
Sport thought. He whickered a low warning to Adam.
“Goin’
better than I’d a-thought,” Joe agreed. “Careful … easy now … you may
even be able to walk right up to him.”
“Looks
that way.” Hoss came closer. Mouser
flipped his tail. “Hey, there, ol’ boy … now, you just stay easy … you
know lil’ ol’ Hop Lee could use some comp’ny tonight …” He reached
out.
Mouser,
Sport decided, might well have been there at Marathon and Waterloo; he boasted a
strategic ability second to none. The cat sprang—not at Joe, not between them,
but right straight at Hoss. Seventeen pounds of muscular motion collided
paws-first with Hoss’ chest, and Sport was just sorry he hadn’t time to
offer Adam odds on whether the middle Cartwright son would remain upright.
“Oomph!” Hoss
rocked backward, gasped for breath and keeled over flat on his back in a cloud
of snow.
“Catch
him!” Joe screeched.
But
Mouser, sending up sprays of white, dodged across the yard as if the dogs of
hell were after him.
“How
the heck’m I s’pposed ta do that?” Hoss wheezed. “Y’er the one with
two feet under ya—you catch ’im!”
Joe
scrambled wildly, but he was no match for a cat with purpose, and Mouser was
intent on the top of the log pile next to the kitchen. After an athletic display
that resembled a windmill on ice, Joe landed hard next to Hoss.
Adam’s
droll voice sounded low in his ear. “We haven’t had this much fun since Hoss
discovered the Leprechauns.” He stepped back to the porch, careful to make no
noise, and extracted another bottle from the wooden box. Sport nuzzled his
thanks as Adam refilled his cup. Then the Boss returned to his post, leaning up
against Sport’s shoulder, and they both focused on the little tableau now
unfolding near the kitchen door.
“Now,
dang it, Mouser, ya gotta have a heart,” Hoss was telling the cat as he inched
closer to the woodpile. The back of his brown coat was solid white and his
ten-gallon hat stood out like a beacon against the dim trees behind him. “We
got a real nice lil’ boy upstairs—you know ’im, ya met ’im, and it’d
be real kind if you’d just think o’ sumbuddy other’n yerself tonight.”
“Yeah,
an’ we’d even make it worth your while,” Joe added practically, warily
approaching from another angle. He moved stiffly; his pants were icing up from
the fall in the snow.
Mouser
surveyed them both indifferently.
“Honest
to God, Hoss, if Hop Lee weren’t such a cute kid, I’d think we had rocks in
our head,” Joe muttered. The chilly discomfort of his clothes was dampening
his enthusiasm. “I can just imagine what Adam’d say if he saw us out here
crawling around like a couple of idiots.”
“Yeah,
well, sometimes Adam don’t know when he’s missin’ a good time. You jus’
remember what a nice kid Hop Lee is, brother, ’cause I ain’t givin’ up.”
“I’m
not sayin’ we quit—well, not yet anyhow. I mean, we’ve given it one good
try already, and I wouldn’t wanta think that was a waste o’ time. But you
know, worst comes to worst, Hop Lee isn’t a coward. He knows he’s safe.”
“I
won’t argue with ya there,” Hoss conceded, “but safe’s a long way from
happy.”
“All
right, so … one more try.” Joe slapped at his pants and glanced at the stack
of logs appraisingly. “Look—there’s only one real escape from the top o’
that pile if Mouser doesn’t want to jump up on the roof. My guess is he’ll
head right over us, back to the barn. So you come from that direction”—he
waved to indicate his plan—“and I’ll come this way. If we have to grab at
him, you reach high and I’ll reach low. That way, whichever way he goes,
we’ll have him.”
“That’s
what ya said tha last time.”
“Yeah,
well, maybe we just needed a little practice. I don’t see you
coming up with any big ideas.”
“Gotta
point there …”
“A
nice piece of chicken from dinner might have worked wonders,” Adam murmured to
Sport, and the big gelding nodded.
“Now!”
Across
the clearing, Hoss and Joe leapt at the cat. They leapt well—straight, true,
high and long. And crashed straight into each other before descending
spectacularly into the snow, narrowly missing painful contact with the woodpile.
Neither was paying much attention as Mouser soared overhead on his way to the
roof.
“Hoss?”
Joe’s groan issued from a series of gentle white slopes that looked
like a miniature mountain range. “That does it.”
Hoss
sat up, swiping his wet face with his hand. Impossibly, his hat still sat
squarely on his head, but his wool coat was now a startling white all over. He
brushed snow from his cheeks and eyelashes. “Yeah, I guess.”
“Hop
Lee’s a real nice kid, but he’s just gonna have to get through the night on
his own.”
“Ain’t
nothin’ we can do about it.” Hoss’ dissatisfaction was evident in his
tone, but a note of resignation was there too. “I’d go after ’im agin,
Joe, but you know Mouser. Ain’t no way we’re gonna get him, now that he’s
sure we’re after ’im. And I’m sa cold ’n’ wet, it might not be too
safe if I got my hands on that bag o’ bones ’n’ fur anyhow, what I might
do to ’im.”
Joe
giggled. “Yeah, brother, I’m sure Mouser’s real afraid.”
“Joe,
I’m warnin’ ya—I ain’t crazy about givin’ up in the first place, and
you—”
“Yeah,
yeah.” Joe got to his feet first and reached down to help his brother. He
rubbed his cheek gingerly.
“What’s
a-matter?” Hoss asked worriedly. “I hit ya goin’ down?”
“You
didn’t mean to.”
“Nah,
but it looks like I got ya a good one, Joe. Y’er like ta have a shiner by
mornin’.”
Joe’s
eyes glimmered. “Y’know, brother, I prob’ly had it comin’. Only a
fool’d go chasin’ around after a barn cat in the middle of the night!”
Hoss
finally chuckled. “Well, I reckon it was worth it. I just wish we’d got him
fer Hop Lee.” He shook his head. “Strangest thing. I ain’t never seen
Mouser go up ta nobody like he did Hop Lee. It was real—aw, you know—kinda
sweet ta see.”
Joe
was serious for a moment. “I wish we coulda got ’im too, Hoss. You know
Mouser—if we coulda got it through his head that he’d be spendin’ the
night in a nice warm bed, he’d-a moved in like he owned the place. Hop Lee
wouldn’t’ve had a chance to be lonely.” With a sigh, he slapped Hoss’
shoulder. “Let’s get back inside. I don’t know about you, but I could use
something hot. Chocolate, maybe, or a shot of Pa’s brandy …”
The
kitchen door closed behind them and the yard fell silent.
iii
“That,”
Adam observed, “was priceless.”
Sport
curled his neck around to nibble at the Boss’ cuff before returning his
attention to his cup of champagne. It had turned into quite an enjoyable
evening, he reflected. A nice time with the Boss, real
nice with the champagne … a little deep thought, a little comedy … and a
whole lot of beauty. The snow had stopped and the bright sheen of the moon
seemed to glow off of everything.
“Well,
that saved us from having to discuss what Christmas is all about,” Adam
remarked, massaging behind Sport’s ears.
Oh? The chestnut
gelding regarded his human curiously. How
d’you figure that?
Adam’s
eyes gleamed. “In case you didn’t realize it, you old heathen, what you just
saw pretty much summed up the lot of it. Even the ghosts and the reindeer.”
If
Sport had had eyebrows, he would have raised them. He nickered his confusion,
but realized suddenly that he wasn’t quite as concerned about it as he had
been. Maybe it was the champagne, or more likely it was the pleasant evening
with the Boss, but nothing seemed quite as urgent as it had before. Christmas
being an annual event, perhaps it would not be considered a failure to leave the
puzzle’s actual solution until next year.
“Yeah,”
Adam replied, sliding his hand along Sport’s neck to scrape deliberately at
the gelding’s withers.
Sport
lost control, stretched his neck and curled his upper lip in response to the
mesmerizing stimulation. Little shivers and warmth and peace and excitement all
coursed through his body at once. Withers-scratching ranked right up there with
champagne in terms of treats.
“It’s
called good will,” the Boss went on. He quit scratching to refill Sport’s
cup, and the gelding was able to order his mind enough to follow the line of
thought. His attention must have been apparent, because after a bit, Adam
continued, “Imagine this night two thousand years ago, and picture angels
reassuring shepherds in the fields with their flocks.”
That
took quite a bit of imagination, as Sport knew little or nothing about
sheep—except that cattle folks hated them—but he did his best.
For
a moment, Adam’s voice turned mellow with his thoughts. “Nice image, isn’t
it? Divine assurance for some poor fellows out in the country with their herds,
starting to get scared over something they couldn’t understand.” He paused
and then went on briskly, “Y’see, it was that star in the heavens, which was
quite a bit brighter than anything anyone had ever seen before, that upset the
shepherds …” And then he stopped again and muttered ruefully, “And this
explanation could be as long as the Old Testament. … All right, the best
abridged version is a hymn. Consider it a poem, because I’m not gonna stand
here and sing to you at this time of night.”
The
Boss squared his shoulders and breathed deeply from his diaphragm; he might not
sing, Sport thought, but he wasn’t one to pass up an opportunity for
declamation. “‘Forthwith appeared a shining throng of angels praising God,
who thus addressed their joyful song …” Although subdued, Adam’s rich
baritone wrapped around the words like a warm blanket, and Sport felt a strange
calm washing over him, rather like how he’d felt when he’d just stepped out
of the barn. “‘All glory be to God on high and on the earth be peace; good
will henceforth from heav’n to men begin and never cease.’
“Good
will,” he repeated. He ran his fingers through Sport’s forelock. “And you
have to admit that very few people have more good will than my brothers.”
Sport
butted Adam’s chest gently. You too,
Boss. It runs in the family.
“And
so … for inquiring fellows like you, that’s what the child in the stable,
the reindeer and the ghost story all have in common. Simple, huh?”
Sport
gazed at him solemnly. Nothing was simple with Adam Cartwright, and he suspected
nothing very much was simple about Christmas either. But then, it was kind of
nice that apparently this whole Christmas thing could be simple if you wanted it
to be. Simple like the plumes of white snow on the tall pines around the house,
and the clean taste of the champagne, and the steady, even touch of the Boss’
hand on his neck.
“Come
on, boy. Time to get you back in the barn—and time for me to hit the hay.”
Adam slipped his hand under the gelding’s chin and gently turned him away from
the house.
Sport
followed quietly. He was still mulling over the thoughts of shepherds and angels
and Cartwrights when the Boss stopped so suddenly that they nearly had a
collision right there in the yard.
“I
don’t believe it.” Adam’s voice was barely audible—except for the little
squeak that indicated he was really surprised—but Sport caught it, and he
followed his human’s gaze to the roof.
In
the unmarked expanse of white on the slope above the first floor, Mouser was
picking his way carefully toward the window, shaking snow from his paws with
each step. When he was just below the sill, he rose on his hind legs and slapped
hard against the glass pane. Nothing happened.
“Miaow,”
Mouser called and rose again, pawing roughly at the unyielding panel. But the
clearing remained silent.
Adam
and Sport stood like statues, watching as the cat rose a third time on his hind
legs and called plaintively, “Miaow.”
And
then they heard the scratchy sound of a rising window and saw a small boy’s
face, his straight black hair disheveled. And finally, the last flick of
Mouser’s tail as the tomcat bounded into the room and the boy closed the
window behind him.
“‘And
the whole world give back the song which now the angels sing,’” Adam quoted
softly. Then he stroked Sport’s shoulder and they resumed their walk to the
barn.
It
was dark inside when they got there. Everyone was dozing; only Chubb roused a
little when Adam lit the lantern. The chestnut gelding walked obediently to his
stall. He was getting a little sleepy and the prospect of a nice long snooze was
appealing.
“All
right, old boy, it’s been fun,” Adam murmured.
Sport
shook his head and felt the little wispy strokes of his forelock. Wish
it didn’t have to end, Boss. He wasn’t sure if the Boss even realized
what was happening between them. Sometimes, looking into Adam’s eyes, he was
certain his human knew they were speaking the same language, and other times,
Sport was pretty sure it was just coincidence. And on top of it all, he hadn’t
any idea if they were speaking English or Equine. What
a damn puzzle, he thought, and snuffled his concern. With Christmas as
special as it was, it was likely that their magical communication was just for
tonight—a gift, like all those wrapped-up presents the humans handed out. Or a
little miracle.
A
low-pitched whuff from the next stall reminded them that Chubb was awake, and
Sport realized that he had something left to do before the night ended.
“Hey,
Chubb?”
“Yeah,
Sport?”
“I’m
sorry I was short with you.”
There
was a pause as Chubb moved closer to the stall partition, and then his muzzle
appeared between the planks. “Don’t think about it. I know how ya git when
ya’ve got yer mind fixed on somethin’ and it ain’t comin’ sa easy.”
Sport
was touched. “Thanks, old friend.”
“Didja
get it all figured out?”
“Most
of it. But I left a few questions for next year.” Sport pushed his head gently
against Adam.
The
Boss scratched him again behind the ears, ran a hand down his face, and even
reached out to tickle Chubb’s lip. “All right, boys,” he said. He slipped
through Sport’s door and turned out the lantern. “Merry Christmas to all,
and to all a good night.”
©
December 2003 as allowed
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